I had forgotten what it feels like. My heart actually hurts, like it is in real, physical pain. It feels like the pain is tearing through my entire body, clawing its way through my bones, my flesh. Crawling to my head. Waiting, slowly but surely, to explode.
It’s not been a good day. There’s so much I want to say, but no number of words seem to convey my feelings accurately enough.
Can’t wait for today to just get over.
It seems to me like lists are the order of the day. There’s a list about everything – why it’s great to be married to a photographer, why being the younger sibling is the best thing ever (sure, why not!), why you should travel alone, why.. Oh well, you get the drift.
So yes, I decided to jump on the already overcrowded bandwagon and offer my 2 cents. I’m pretty sure this list has already been done (I mean, seriously, the number of lists is mindboggling for my math-challenged brain!), but I haven’t come across one that deals with this topic yet and I haven’t bothered looking for one, because, heck, I want to write this list! (And I don’t want to be influenced by what is already out there for mass consumption.)
So, here goes.
Why It Is NOT So Great Being Married to a Journalist.
No money, honey.
Call me superficial and materialistic for starting my list with this, but I might as well establish this fact right at the start: There’s no money in the field. (See http://www.careercast.com/jobs-rated/worst-jobs-2014 if you don’t believe me.) Those investment bankers and software geniuses can keep the moolah. Yeah, you pretty much get used to living life on peanuts. Thank god they are healthy. Burrp.
Good morning, baby. Sweet dreams.
Yup, you read that right. His timings are going to ruin your concept of time. Sometimes he’s out by 6am. Sometimes he’s back by 1am. Sometimes he leaves at 4pm. Sometimes, at 2pm. C’mon, whoever came up with the idea of a 9am-6pm job must have been soft in the head. Who wants a routine, a regular sleep cycle, and a life?!
You start your morning discussing how the tabloid you’re subscribed to should have used an M dash and not an N dash (or maybe it’s the other way around, I can’t remember; not sure I want to either) in their headline. The rest of your day is peppered with how a music album has mixed up its ‘your’ and ‘you’re’; how the hoarding on the way back home didn’t know the meaning of brevity in ad copy; Facebook statuses that have you quickly googling word meanings so you can then use the thesaurus to post an almost equally intelligent comment; and how everybody needs a grammar lesson or two. Grammar Nazi personified.(Hey, not like I’m some dumb nitwit or anything, but he really sets the bar high!)
No surprises. No shocks.
Whether it is embarrassing wedding videos or footage of the most amazing proposal ever, it’s really hard to evoke a strong reaction from a journalist. Not that they are completely unaffected; it’s just really hard to show them something they haven’t seen over and over. Trust me, their level of nonchalance and seeming indifference can be a nightmare! (Yes, I’m almost bald now, having faced many, many situations that had me pulling my hair out.)
He’s smart. He’s well-read. He’s knowledgeable. He can have an intelligent conversation about almost everything. Sounds perfect, doesn’t it? Now imagine having a conversation with a person who does not know it all. What does our dear journalist friend do? Not talk. Not worth talking to someone who doesn’t know enough, you see. The contradictions of asking questions for a living and being anti-social at a party can leave you with very few friends. If any.
Okay, so I’ve ranted about the disadvantages of living with a journalist, and made many enemies in the process, I’m sure. And I’m not sure how to say this right, but these very reasons are also why it is AWESOME to be married to a journalist. There may be no money, but there’s… corny alert… a lot of honey. There’s no routine, so you can never say “same shit, another day”. You know your kids will grow up learning from the best. You know he’s a realist and will always be true. And you know that you’ll be great friends. And he’ll teach you everything he knows.
Seems like an anti-climax? Well, such is life.